How does Alias find his sheep in long grass?

Very Satisfying

---------------

What do you call 4 sheep tied to a lamppost at Alias's medical ward?

A Lieisure Center

---------------
"On The Bridge" had a little Sheep,
He took it to bed to warm his feet,
then he saw it was a ram,
"On The Bridge" had a little Lamb.

--------------------

A shepherd (Alias) and his dog are shipwrecked onto a remote Scottish
island. After a few days Alias decides to explore the island. Alias
discovers that the only other inhabitants are sheep. He recalls how his farm
buddies would brag how they would sometimes make love to sheep and he says
to himself: 'I'll never be that desperate.'
Sooooo, a few days later he can't get those sheep out of his mind, and soon
he's sneaking up on the flock. Just as he is about to pounce on a really
cute one, the dog grabs his leg and won't let go. He snaps to, and thanks
the dog for keeping him from making a fool of himself. This same scene
happens every night for a month and the shepherd is really getting unhappy
at the dog. Suddenly one day, the man spies a liferaft bobbing in the surf.
In the raft is a beautiful young girl, half dead but alive. He takes her
back to his hut revives her and nurses her to health. After a few days the
girl is feeling fine, and that evening a rush of gratitude sweeps over
her.... She confronts the man: 'I owe you my life. I'm yours forever. I'll
do anything you want' 'Anything?'
'Anything!!' 'OK, hold that dog for ten minutes!!!'

----------------------------

A couple months back there was this trial in the Spanish courts. Alias was
being tried for fornicating with a sheep, since that's illegal after all.

Anyway, the key witness, "On the Bridge" was an old fella who was walking
along the highway by the farm where the sheep was raised. The prosecutor
asked the witness what he saw: 'Well, I was walkin' along, and saw this
sheep just'a eatin' grass. And then this fella walks up from behind the
sheep, real quiet-like.'

'And then what?' asked the prosecutor.

'Then he unbuckled his belt, and pulled the sheep close.'

'And what happened after that?'

'Well,' said the witness, 'they sorta shook for a couple of minutes. THEN,
afterwards, the sheep turned around... an' licked him!'

Just then one of the members of the jury leaned over to the jury member next
to him and said, 'You know .. a good sheep'll do that.'

--------------------------

"On The Bridge" finally makes his fortune and is having his dream house
bulit. As he talks to the architect on how he wants the house built he says,
'See that tree there, don't cut it down because under that tree I made love
for the first time.'

The architect says he understands the sentimental value of the tree and he
will design the house so that the tree isn't harmed.

Then "On The Bridge" says, 'And you see that tree over there, I don't want
it cut either, because her mother stood there and watched as we made love.'

The architect could hardly believe his ears,'That's incredible, what did her
mother say?'

To which the man replies,'Baaaaaa.''

I Love Sheep. Just FYI

"On The Bridge - Drunk As A Skunk" <onthebridge@nutjob.com> wrote in message
news:uJoL5IviIHA.4468@TK2MSFTNGP03.phx.gbl...
> How does Alias find his sheep in long grass?
>
> Very Satisfying
>
> ---------------
>
> What do you call 4 sheep tied to a lamppost at Alias's medical ward?
>
> A Lieisure Center
>
> ---------------
> "On The Bridge" had a little Sheep,
> He took it to bed to warm his feet,
> then he saw it was a ram,
> "On The Bridge" had a little Lamb.
>
> --------------------
>
> A shepherd (Alias) and his dog are shipwrecked onto a remote Scottish
> island. After a few days Alias decides to explore the island. Alias
> discovers that the only other inhabitants are sheep. He recalls how his
> farm buddies would brag how they would sometimes make love to sheep and he
> says to himself: 'I'll never be that desperate.'
> Sooooo, a few days later he can't get those sheep out of his mind, and
> soon he's sneaking up on the flock. Just as he is about to pounce on a
> really cute one, the dog grabs his leg and won't let go. He snaps to, and
> thanks the dog for keeping him from making a fool of himself. This same
> scene happens every night for a month and the shepherd is really getting
> unhappy at the dog. Suddenly one day, the man spies a liferaft bobbing in
> the surf. In the raft is a beautiful young girl, half dead but alive. He
> takes her back to his hut revives her and nurses her to health. After a
> few days the girl is feeling fine, and that evening a rush of gratitude
> sweeps over her.... She confronts the man: 'I owe you my life. I'm yours
> forever. I'll do anything you want' 'Anything?'
> 'Anything!!' 'OK, hold that dog for ten minutes!!!'
>
> ----------------------------
>
> A couple months back there was this trial in the Spanish courts. Alias was
> being tried for fornicating with a sheep, since that's illegal after all.
>
> Anyway, the key witness, "On the Bridge" was an old fella who was walking
> along the highway by the farm where the sheep was raised. The prosecutor
> asked the witness what he saw: 'Well, I was walkin' along, and saw this
> sheep just'a eatin' grass. And then this fella walks up from behind the
> sheep, real quiet-like.'
>
> 'And then what?' asked the prosecutor.
>
> 'Then he unbuckled his belt, and pulled the sheep close.'
>
> 'And what happened after that?'
>
> 'Well,' said the witness, 'they sorta shook for a couple of minutes. THEN,
> afterwards, the sheep turned around... an' licked him!'
>
> Just then one of the members of the jury leaned over to the jury member
> next to him and said, 'You know .. a good sheep'll do that.'
>
> --------------------------
>
> "On The Bridge" finally makes his fortune and is having his dream house
> bulit. As he talks to the architect on how he wants the house built he
> says, 'See that tree there, don't cut it down because under that tree I
> made love for the first time.'
>
> The architect says he understands the sentimental value of the tree and he
> will design the house so that the tree isn't harmed.
>
> Then "On The Bridge" says, 'And you see that tree over there, I don't want
> it cut either, because her mother stood there and watched as we made
> love.'
>
> The architect could hardly believe his ears,'That's incredible, what did
> her mother say?'
>
> To which the man replies,'Baaaaaa.''
>
>
>
>

Very good indeed Kevpan, Spanky etc, Jees!
"On The Bridge - Drunk As A Skunk" <onthebridge@nutjob.com> wrote in message
news:uJoL5IviIHA.4468@TK2MSFTNGP03.phx.gbl...
> How does Alias find his sheep in long grass?
>
> Very Satisfying
>
> ---------------
>
> What do you call 4 sheep tied to a lamppost at Alias's medical ward?
>
> A Lieisure Center
>
> ---------------
> "On The Bridge" had a little Sheep,
> He took it to bed to warm his feet,
> then he saw it was a ram,
> "On The Bridge" had a little Lamb.
>
> --------------------
>
> A shepherd (Alias) and his dog are shipwrecked onto a remote Scottish
> island. After a few days Alias decides to explore the island. Alias
> discovers that the only other inhabitants are sheep. He recalls how his
> farm buddies would brag how they would sometimes make love to sheep and he
> says to himself: 'I'll never be that desperate.'
> Sooooo, a few days later he can't get those sheep out of his mind, and
> soon he's sneaking up on the flock. Just as he is about to pounce on a
> really cute one, the dog grabs his leg and won't let go. He snaps to, and
> thanks the dog for keeping him from making a fool of himself. This same
> scene happens every night for a month and the shepherd is really getting
> unhappy at the dog. Suddenly one day, the man spies a liferaft bobbing in
> the surf. In the raft is a beautiful young girl, half dead but alive. He
> takes her back to his hut revives her and nurses her to health. After a
> few days the girl is feeling fine, and that evening a rush of gratitude
> sweeps over her.... She confronts the man: 'I owe you my life. I'm yours
> forever. I'll do anything you want' 'Anything?'
> 'Anything!!' 'OK, hold that dog for ten minutes!!!'
>
> ----------------------------
>
> A couple months back there was this trial in the Spanish courts. Alias was
> being tried for fornicating with a sheep, since that's illegal after all.
>
> Anyway, the key witness, "On the Bridge" was an old fella who was walking
> along the highway by the farm where the sheep was raised. The prosecutor
> asked the witness what he saw: 'Well, I was walkin' along, and saw this
> sheep just'a eatin' grass. And then this fella walks up from behind the
> sheep, real quiet-like.'
>
> 'And then what?' asked the prosecutor.
>
> 'Then he unbuckled his belt, and pulled the sheep close.'
>
> 'And what happened after that?'
>
> 'Well,' said the witness, 'they sorta shook for a couple of minutes. THEN,
> afterwards, the sheep turned around... an' licked him!'
>
> Just then one of the members of the jury leaned over to the jury member
> next to him and said, 'You know .. a good sheep'll do that.'
>
> --------------------------
>
> "On The Bridge" finally makes his fortune and is having his dream house
> bulit. As he talks to the architect on how he wants the house built he
> says, 'See that tree there, don't cut it down because under that tree I
> made love for the first time.'
>
> The architect says he understands the sentimental value of the tree and he
> will design the house so that the tree isn't harmed.
>
> Then "On The Bridge" says, 'And you see that tree over there, I don't want
> it cut either, because her mother stood there and watched as we made
> love.'
>
> The architect could hardly believe his ears,'That's incredible, what did
> her mother say?'
>
> To which the man replies,'Baaaaaa.''
>
>
>
>

On The Bridge - Drunk As A Skunk wrote:
> How does Alias find his sheep in long grass?
>
> Very Satisfying
>
> ---------------
>
> What do you call 4 sheep tied to a lamppost at Alias's medical ward?
>
> A Lieisure Center
>
> ---------------
> "On The Bridge" had a little Sheep,
> He took it to bed to warm his feet,
> then he saw it was a ram,
> "On The Bridge" had a little Lamb.
>
> --------------------
>
> A shepherd (Alias) and his dog are shipwrecked onto a remote Scottish
> island. After a few days Alias decides to explore the island. Alias
> discovers that the only other inhabitants are sheep. He recalls how his farm
> buddies would brag how they would sometimes make love to sheep and he says
> to himself: 'I'll never be that desperate.'
> Sooooo, a few days later he can't get those sheep out of his mind, and soon
> he's sneaking up on the flock. Just as he is about to pounce on a really
> cute one, the dog grabs his leg and won't let go. He snaps to, and thanks
> the dog for keeping him from making a fool of himself. This same scene
> happens every night for a month and the shepherd is really getting unhappy
> at the dog. Suddenly one day, the man spies a liferaft bobbing in the surf.
> In the raft is a beautiful young girl, half dead but alive. He takes her
> back to his hut revives her and nurses her to health. After a few days the
> girl is feeling fine, and that evening a rush of gratitude sweeps over
> her.... She confronts the man: 'I owe you my life. I'm yours forever. I'll
> do anything you want' 'Anything?'
> 'Anything!!' 'OK, hold that dog for ten minutes!!!'
>
> ----------------------------
>
> A couple months back there was this trial in the Spanish courts. Alias was
> being tried for fornicating with a sheep, since that's illegal after all.
>
> Anyway, the key witness, "On the Bridge" was an old fella who was walking
> along the highway by the farm where the sheep was raised. The prosecutor
> asked the witness what he saw: 'Well, I was walkin' along, and saw this
> sheep just'a eatin' grass. And then this fella walks up from behind the
> sheep, real quiet-like.'
>
> 'And then what?' asked the prosecutor.
>
> 'Then he unbuckled his belt, and pulled the sheep close.'
>
> 'And what happened after that?'
>
> 'Well,' said the witness, 'they sorta shook for a couple of minutes. THEN,
> afterwards, the sheep turned around... an' licked him!'
>
> Just then one of the members of the jury leaned over to the jury member next
> to him and said, 'You know .. a good sheep'll do that.'
>
> --------------------------
>
> "On The Bridge" finally makes his fortune and is having his dream house
> bulit. As he talks to the architect on how he wants the house built he says,
> 'See that tree there, don't cut it down because under that tree I made love
> for the first time.'
>
> The architect says he understands the sentimental value of the tree and he
> will design the house so that the tree isn't harmed.
>
> Then "On The Bridge" says, 'And you see that tree over there, I don't want
> it cut either, because her mother stood there and watched as we made love.'
>
> The architect could hardly believe his ears,'That's incredible, what did her
> mother say?'
>
> To which the man replies,'Baaaaaa.''
>
>
>
>
hehehe...I'm so glad that you're not a "sheepish" person...LOL!
Frank